A whole week gone

So it has been a whole week since I posted last. I feel bad about that, but over all I feel better as long as I don't meds all the time.....weird..... So I am taking only my antidepressants and my husband said that I am much more user friendly and easier to talk to now.......that is good. Nothing to exciting going on for now, but that will change soon I am sure.

Looooooooong weeeeeekend

So this Sunday evening finds me feeling much better as I went to see my lovely md. She increased my depression meds and told me that if they don't work this time, it is time to go see a shrink????????? Are you serious. ok so I am following her orders and so far so good. We will see in time how it goes. In the mean time, my husband and I have really reconnected, re communicated and talked alot. It makes things so much better when we are on the same page that is for sure. As for pain, well everyday starts at a 5 with 10 being the worst...somedays it becomes and 8 most days are 5 to 6. That is definately today 5. But tomorrow is a new day. Maybe pain will be a 4....there is always hope.

I am a B*&^%

So today my lovely husband decided to let me know in really nice way that I am acting like a B*&^%....that being said, I am on my way to the doctor to ensure that I am taking the appropriate amount of medicine. I am truly heart broken in so many ways I can't even tell you. I feel angry because everyone in his family thinks I am a bitch, and no one wants to talk to me or always thinks I am angry at them. I have no idea what to do or where to go. I wanna run away and not come back, that is not the answer. So to strive on is the only way to survive. I hate when this syndrome gets to me like this. Sometimes I want to jump off a cliff. I think sometimes life would be so much easier for everyone if I wasn't here. But I have to keep going, I can't stop. I have to look at the good stuff, so I don't break down any more. This SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another wonderful week

It was an extremely busy weekend, so I wasn't able to post. I do have a couple more things to share. I think I have a new reaction to my narcotic pain meds.....itchiness as well as feeling more up tight, and headache...however, if I take a muscle relaxer in addition, it doesn't help me relax at all. I causes me to dream to the point of almost like hallucinations... I have enough issues without all that going on. So no more of those meds. Gotta stick to something much more simple. Loved being outside and noticing the amazing colors on the trees...beautiful. It makes me thankful to actually be alive. Something I don't experience often nowadays. Hope you all have a blessed week.